Wednesday, February 22, 2012

19 weeks and thoughts on pregnancy




I'm 19 weeks today. Hard to believe I'm a week away from being half way thru this pregnancy.

I'm up 15 lbs. total, not having any real cravings, I'm in maternity pants but normal tops still, and sleep pretty good minus the potty interruptions 2-3 times a night.

Best moment of the week? Being back at work amongst the living. I've missed it and it is making me feel better.

It's been a hard two days for me. Yesterday, I made the mistake of looking thru pre-pregnancy pictures and I cried for a good hour. Listen, I know what some of you are thinking......."it's for a short time, you can loose the weight after, be grateful for being pregnant." I know. I am grateful and thankful. But, for someone who worked really hard to loose 25 lbs and was in almost the best shape of her life, being pregnant is depressing. I feel really bad about myself. I'm pale, gaining weight, can't run anymore, and I work and am surrounded by women all day in the beauty industry. It's hard. I get dressed and just feel ugly everyday. I've been praying for myself to focus on the positive, I'll be having a baby at the end of all this.

Honestly, sometimes I wish people would tell you all the non-fun things about pregnancy. Some women love being pregnant, I'm not one of them. It just makes me laugh when people make it sound like sunshine and roses when in actuality, there are a ton of things that are just............depressing.

Enough of my rant. These are all thoughts I know other women have (because I've talked to several about this) but no one likes to admit.

I think I'll feel better too once we (hopefully) find out if it's a boy or girl. March 6th can't come fast enough!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

3 comments:

Jenna @ Sharing My Jennarocity said...

I know it doesn't help, but you are not alone. Alot of women feel the same way you do and felt that way when they were pregnant. You just kind of have to learn to accept that your body is going to change and it won't go back to being the same way it used to be. I am not saying you will always be fat or anything, I just mean that your body will just be different. Don't spend too much time thinking about how your body looks. There isn't a whole lot you can do about it now, and it will seriously just depress you. I am sending you a link to an article, maybe it will help, maybe not. But I think you would do well to start focusing on the positives - with your hormones flunctuating, just do your best not to let yourself get stuck in that mode of being upset. Let's go shop for some baby stuff and start thinking about all of the great parts of being pregnant!

http://www.parents.com/pregnancy/my-life/emotions/four-pregnancy-emotions/

Hall Around Texas said...

Well, I just saw you on Sunday and you look BEAUTIFUL!!!! You are glowing and you look amazing. :)

~Stefanie~ said...

You need to read the books Belly Laughs and Baby Laughs by Jenny McCarthy. I read them during my pregnancy with both girls and was prepared for some of the things I experienced that no one told me about. (She's got a potty mouth, but she's honest, funny and informative)

You look great and are a beautiful!